TRUST

I thought I had given up on blogging, and this may be the only post I am able to complete before the birth of my fourth child.  The last time I posted (Sept. 2009), I was not even thinking of another baby, or pregnancy, or ??  Life is funny that way, moving us in directions we didn't think we would be taking.  I often think about things from a year past and marvel at how God has directed my life since the same month a year previous.  Then, of course, my mind drifts to the next year, same month, and wonder where I'll be, what I'll be doing, how will my husband and children be, what changes will have been made, etc?  WOW!!  Just so many things to think about, it's mind boggling. 

So, what need I to do . . . fret, worry, get anxious, excited, wonder???  I think the conclusion I've come to is this:  TRUST!  I think of so many Scripture verses that make me realize how and why I MUST do this. 

1)  Proverbs 3:5-6  Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

2)  Psalm 9:10 - And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.

3)  Psalm 16:1 - Preserve me, O God: for in thee do I put my trust.

4)  Psalm 37:3 - Trust in the LORD, and do good; [so] shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.

5)  Isaiah 26:4 - Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH [is] everlasting strength:

I could easily list many more.  There are 134 verses in the Scriptures that contain the word "trust."  Most refer to trusting in the Lord, though some use the word to mean the same as "believe" or "care."  Here is how I have been teaching my children to understand the word, especially in regard to how I want them to trust me as their mom.  From the time they were able to understand, I have told them that they can always trust me because, 1) I will always take care of them, and 2) I will always tell them the truth.  Isn't this what we believe about God.  Granted, trusting in God is much more complete as He is much more capable of keeping His promises, but I do pray and strive to keep my promise to my children in this.

Now I'm back to looking at the next year.  Where?  When?  How?  Why?  So many questions I could ask.  However, as I rest in the Lord and trust in His Word, His Care, His Love, and so much more, I am comforted and calmed, knowing that I can move forward regardless of what lies ahead because I know that He will keep my footing sure and steadfast.  He has been proven in the past, and I know He will be faithful in the future. 

Well, I will hopefully be able to write a lot more soon!  By then, I hope to have a new baby girl to hold in my arms.  By then, I hope to have started off our school year.  By then, I hope my faith will have grown just a little bit more.  :)  In the meantime, I will safely trust in the loving arms of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

This is a TOUGH one, but oh so important!

Anyone who knows me knows that I can be very passionate about the things I value or in which I believe. Of my parent's six children, I have always been the most dramatic, probably causing their faces to turn red in embarrassment (and maybe anger) a few times. I'm sorry, Mom and Dad. :)

Well, when I got to this particular part of Titus 2 - "That they may teach the younger women . . . to be discreet . . . " - I had to smile. Oh, this one is a hard one for me to practice, and I still have a lot to learn.

So, let's learn together. Here's what I found:

According to the Random House Webster's College Dictionary (1992) discretion is defined as "the power or right to decide or act according to one's own judgement"; or "the quality of being discreet; prudence or decorum; tactfulness." Now, the first definition can sound a little like what is recorded in Judges 17:6 which says, "but every man did that which was right in his own eyes." Trusting our own judgements apart from any counsel from God's Word is sure to turn into folly. This cannot be what is meant in Titus 2 or any other passage that discusses a person being discreet. Let's look at a few:

1. Genesis 41:33 - Joseph tells Pharoah to "look out a man discreet and wise," to which Pharoah answers to Joseph in verse 39 that "there is none so discreet and wise as thou art." Coupled with the word wise would indicate that Joseph was trusting in the Lord for the counsel he offered to Pharoah.
2. Mark 12:34 says that "Jesus saw that he answered discreetly," and Jesus answered that the scribe was not far from the kingdom of God.
3. When Proverbs speaks of discretion specifically concerning a woman, 11:22 refers to it in the negative. When a woman cannot control her passions (whatever those may be), she is likened to a pig who needs a ring in its nose in order to control it. She needs someone to "yank her chain" in order to keep her in line. She must not be heeding God's Word in her life.

So, what is the Biblical definition of discretion or the word in Titus 2, discreet? Strong's Exhaustive Concordance says (Greek Dictionary #4998, for Titus 2:5) that discreet is (1) to be "safe (sound) in mind," (2) "self-controlled [moderate in passion or opinion]", or (3) "discreet, sober, temperate."
How then does that translate into what a young wife is supposed to be for her husband?

• Sound mind speaks of have right thinking. This comes from daily being in God's Word and "training my brain and mouth" to think and speak what I meditate on from what I study in the Bible.
• Self-control is simply choosing to restrain one's self in all areas of life. This ranges from our eating habits to work or entertainment habits to our habits concerning Bible reading, prayer, church commitment, etc. All parts of our lives are intertwined and cannot be separate or compartmentalized.
• Discreet, sober, and temperate are really defined in the above two points, but really involve our treatment of others regardless of their treatment to us. Do we display the love of Christ at all times, or is it only when it's convenient for us or when they've treated us as we want to be treated? It really goes back to motives and what's most important to us.

Let me now answer the above question in how I, as a young wife, should behave toward my husband - in all situations, whether he is directly or indirectly involved. I do everything to be considerate of him. I speak kindly to him and about him. I plan menus based upon what he likes (while at the same time thinking of what is healthy and beneficial to him). I make myself look as he wants me to look, esp. when we are alone.
Is this always easy? Of course not! I have a sinful flesh that wages war in me, and I have to CHOOSE to have discretion. I have to choose to be considerate whether it's convenient for me or not. I have to decide that my relationship with my husband, my children, or anyone else in my life is more important that what people think of me.
It really goes back to the 2nd greatest commandment - "Love thy neighbor as thyself," as well as, the Golden Rule - "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
Now, I am going out to "hoe the row."

But They're Driving Me Crazy

This particular post is one of my favorites because it talks about one of primary parts of my "profession." The next phrase in Titus 2:4 is "to love their children." There are times when this is hard because our children may be driving us crazy. However, when this happens with me, it's usually because I'm trying to get something done for myself, and my children are unoccupied. Many times selfish motives on my part are involved.

Involved . . . now there's what I need to be doing. How can I involve my children in my life? I mean in the everyday tasks, chores, "to do's" that need my attention. Just the other day, I thought of a way to keep my daughter busy with me in the kitchen . . . since she is always asking me, "Can I help?" I certainly don't want to say no, but then I end up tripping over her. So I decided that I would get out some "plastics" and let her wash dishes. I tried this, and she was busy for 20 minutes taking care of something for Mommy. WOW! Did I get a lot done!!

What about my oldest who is now five? Even though I want my sons to grow up to be strong and capable men working on manly things, I also want them to have a first-hand knowledge of what it takes to run a household. There is a two-fold purpose for this way of thinking: (1) They will be able to be out on their own someday preparing to have a wife and children, and (2) they will be able to sympathize and even help their wives when they are married and caring for a family.

Of course, then there's a man who can cook . . . now that is a special treat! :)

I think the most important thing I can be doing during all that "involvement" is what God's Word tells me to do in Deuteronomy 6:4-7 - "Hear, O Israel: The Lord our god is one Lord: And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and wit hall thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: (here's the key) And thou shalt teach them diligently (that word means it takes effort, time, and hard work) unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." As each activity is enjoyed, I can be talking to my children about the Lord in every aspect of our lives.
Some of my favorite verses the Lord brings to my mind when I think of my children and the incredible responsibility I have to teach and train them, evangelize them, and disciple them when they come to know the Lord are as follows:

Proverbs 22:6 - "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Some people say that this is not a promise, but I believe it is based upon the wording in the text. If we do our part to train our children, the Lord will keep them there for us. The phrase "he will not depart from it" just seems that simple to me. It doesn't say he may not depart . . . it says he will not depart. Pretty clear, IMHO.

Ephesians 6:4 - "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." Nurture is training, and admonition is the discipline that happens when they choose to disobey the training.

III John 4 - "I have no greater JOY than to hear that my children walk in truth." (all-time favorite) I think what I love about this verse so much is that it says the children will walk in truth, not just believe the truth. That is just so powerful to me. My children, when taught the truth, can make it a part of their lives such that it (the truth) becomes a part of the the very fabric of who they are as individuals. They will remain strong, never wavering from following the Lord Jesus Christ.

There are sooooo many more verse I could share, but the main focus I am trying to communicate here is that each of the verses listed, and the many more the Lord provides for us in His Word, all require involvement. I have to be involving myself in their lives and them in mine. As I do that each day, throughout the day, I know my children will want to be with me, spending time doing the things we love to do TOGETHER!!

Oh, this has been one of my favorite posts. I love my children so much!!! I so want for them to be everything the Lord wills for their lives. I know they will find great JOY in knowing Him and doing His Will! As I obey the Lord, and my children see my example, I know that I am "loving my children," even in the daily parts of life. :)

But do I LIKE him? :)

Now, for the next lesson that we younger women are to learn . . . "to love their husbands." Why do I need to be taught this? According to Strong's, the word love here in Titus 2 is the word phileo, which is that "liking" kind of love. I chuckle to myself here because there are many times when liking someone is a whole lot harder than loving them. We girls don't usually have a hard time loving with that unconditional, yes-I'll-lay-down-my-life-for-you, kind of love.



BUT . . . :)



Do I enjoy picking up your socks? Do I want to iron your shirt? Do I want to make your lunch or dinner? Wives, fill in the blank for your husband?____________________________ It's not always easy to like them when the daily part of life is in our faces all day long. :) This is where the choosing part of love comes in.



If you stop and think right now about what attracted you to your husband, can you say that whatever it was still does attract you to him? What about the other way around? Do you make yourself special just for him?



I know one challenge I have in the busy daily scheduled life I lead is taking time to do something for my husband that's "out of the ordinary" of the everyday, but it's something that I know he likes and is special to him.

Now, here's the hard question . . . do I serve him? cough, cough, sputter, sputter WHAT? You mean . . . wait on him? Do I give him the things he needs with a cheerful smile? What does my body language say to him? Yes, girls, even being a little s*xy for him is important, in the right setting, of course. What do I do to make my husband feel special and important?

Here's the challenge - this week, right now if possible, take time to think of one or even two things you know your husband enjoys, whatever that might be, and do it for him as soon as possible. It could be a favorite meal for dinner. It may be an outfit he likes for you to wear. Could it be a way that you do your hair that he really likes or even ;) turns him on? :)

Whatever it is . . . DECIDE! Then, do it! Even if he's made you upset this week, set that aside. Pray for the Lord's direction to help you forgive him for whatever he's done, mention it only to the Lord, and then serve your man! If something needs to be discussed or resolved, think very carefully if it's something that can wait until after your special time with/for your husband, and set out to accomplish whatever it might be to encourage to him. Let the Lord take over and bring both of you closer to Him and each other. What a wonderful way to "love your husband."

To be sober? What does THAT mean?

I am looking now so much at Titus 2. This particular passage is probably my favorite of all the many passages on the when, where, why, what, how, etc. of a young married woman. I had heard so much about Proverbs 31 and I Peter 3 throughout my life (both and many more of which are absolutely wonderful), but Titus 2 has just really grabbed my attention.


Titus 2:1-5 says "But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine: That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children. To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."

What does it mean to be sober? To me, according to the opening verse, being sober is part of sound doctrine. It's used twice in these five verses, once for the "aged men" and once for the "young women." It must then be important. According to Random House Webster's College Dictionary, sober is first defined in reference to alcohol, but there is much more beyond that to describe this word. Other definitions include: quiet or sedate in demeanor; marked by seriousness; showing self control, just to name a few. The one definition that sticks out the most to me is rational - right thinking. II Timothy 1:7 says, "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind" (rational or right thinking). I think this especially catches my attention because when I think of it in regards to marriage (from the wife's perspective, of course), rational reminds me of how we must behave ourselves with our spouses when both parties are affected by their sin natures. I think that when I have rational or right thinking, it can only come from the wisdom of God. Do I accept it?

So, how are we doing so far? I know when I study this, it is convicting. I know that I'm not always rational in dealing with my husband. I know I don't always show self-control or act quiet and sedate in my demeanor. How can this be possible to accomplish when I allow my sin nature to be in control instead of being controlled by the Holy Spirit? (Gal. 5:16, Eph. 4:18) It isn't possible unless I am being controlled by the Holy Spirit. That is the only way.

Now, let's bring it down to the practical. With wifely duties, how do I practice being sober? If I bring a rational and serious mind to my daily life and home, influenced by my daily reading of God's Word and a constant attitude prayer throughout the day, I will be able to be affective, serving, and loving to my husband and my children. Referring back to my first post, in this, do I glorify God?

Do I glorify God?

In my first entry, I want to say just this: Do I glorify God as a wife and mother? If I cannot answer yes to this all-important question, than I am not in obedience to His Word. Next question . . . If I am glorifying God, what results do I see to prove that to be true? . . . or If I am not glorifying God, what do I need to cut out or change in my life to make sure I can and do glorify Him?

I believe my most important job as a wife and mother is to make sure that I'm living my life according to God's Word. If there are aspects of my life that others see and may not agree with, do I change because I want them to approve of me, or do I keep on quietly obeying what God's Word says because my most important accomplishment is to obey the Lord?

As I train my children, am I showing them the love of Christ by serving their daddy? What if he was not kind that day, left his socks on the floor, didn't push in his chair at the dinner table, or said something rude that hurt my feelings? Does any of that matter?

NO!!

• When Ephesians 4:32 says, "And be ye kind one to another . . . " it does not say that that kindness is conditional or situational. It simply commands me to be kind.
• John 13 records the account of Jesus washing His Disciples feet. He loved them even before those 12 men loved Him, and Judas Iscariot was among them. Love is unconditional.

As I look forward to our seventh anniversary in July, I am praying for the Lord to give me a special measure of His Grace to do what He requires of me. Obedience to Him in not based on
having the right conditions in a given situation. It is based on my willingness to follow what the Lord says, even if everyone else is going in the opposite direction.

It is late, and I am tired. There is more . . . oh, so much more!

Let's look at Titus 2 next. :)